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Spark Me

Spark Me

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 Spark Me was born out of countless honest talks with girlfriends about how life keeps shifting — and how incredible it is when women support each other through it. Co-hosts Michele Dempsey and Liz Graham bring humor, heart, and just the right amount of “did-we-really-just-say-that?” honesty to real conversations about careers, family, identity, health, relationships — and all the curveballs life throws in between.Spark Me Podcast Sciences sociales
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  • Stress, Hormones & Desire: What We Learned from Dr. Erin Murphy Ross

    Stress, Hormones & Desire: What We Learned from Dr. Erin Murphy Ross
    Mar 4 2026

    What if the biggest myth about intimacy is that it’s supposed to stay the same forever?


    In this Spark Me conversation, Liz and Michele unpack their powerful episode with Dr. Erin Murphy Ross — and dive even deeper into the layers of intimacy, desire, hormones, stress, sleep, and evolving expectations in the second act of life.


    They explore the surprising idea that many of us are still measuring our sex lives against a 22-year-old version of ourselves — without ever adjusting for stress, career demands, motherhood, aging, or hormonal shifts. What if nothing is “wrong”? What if it’s simply different?


    From bioidentical hormone therapy to the impact of sleep, from religious messaging to internet porn, from pain during sex to the role of testosterone in women — this episode is honest, nuanced, and empowering.


    It’s not just about sex. It’s about connection, communication, and redefining intimacy on your own terms.


    Most importantly, Liz and Michele remind listeners: you are not broken, you are not alone, and there are answers.


    In This Episode You’ll Learn

    • Why many women unknowingly compare midlife intimacy to their 20s
    • The two major contributors to low desire (hint: stress & hormones)
    • Why hormone testing in your 20s and 30s might matter more than you think
    • What bioidentical hormone therapy is — and why access is becoming a challenge
    • How sleep affects everything from mood to libido
    • Why pain during sex should never be ignored (and what to do about it)
    • The powerful idea that sex is evolving — just like you are
    • How early messaging (family, religion, culture, porn) shapes adult intimacy
    • Why intimacy is about connection, not performance
    • The importance of stopping “bad sex” to avoid training your brain negatively


    Resources From This Episode

    • The New Menopause by Dr. Mary Claire Haver
    • Insight Timer meditation app
    • Pelvic floor therapy resources
    • Dr. Erin Murphy Ross (previous episode)
    • Upcoming episode with menopause specialist Adrienne Cotton


    Keep Sparking

    If this conversation resonated with you:

    • Follow Spark Me wherever you listen to podcasts so you never miss a Spark Short
    • Share this episode with a friend who might be quietly wondering, “Is this normal?”
    • Leave a rating or review — it helps other women in their second act discover the show
    • Tag us when you’re listening and tell us: What surprised you most about this conversation?
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    36 min
  • Stop Having Bad Sex: Desire, Disconnect, and How to Find Your Way Back

    Stop Having Bad Sex: Desire, Disconnect, and How to Find Your Way Back
    Feb 25 2026
    What if your relationship isn’t broken — it’s just overloaded?In this candid and compassionate episode of Spark Me, Liz and Michele sit down with Dr. Erin Murphy Ross — marriage and family therapist and sex therapist — to talk about the conversation so many couples are quietly having… or avoiding.Intimacy and desire in long-term relationships can feel confusing, lonely, and even shame-filled. Is it normal to feel disconnected? Why does stress kill libido? Why does it feel harder to talk about sex with our partner than almost anything else?Dr. Erin pulls back the curtain on what she hears every single day in her therapy practice. From mismatched desire to painful sex, from hormonal shifts to rejection wounds, this conversation normalizes what so many people experience but rarely say out loud.You’ll hear why “most couples aren’t broken — they’re overloaded,” how shame silently shapes our sex lives, and what it really takes to reconnect — emotionally and physically — in the second act of love.If you’ve ever wondered, “Is it just me?” — this episode is for you.In This Episode You’ll Learn:Why stress is one of the biggest libido killers — for both men and womenWhat Dr. Erin means by “sexual role models” and how your past shapes your presentHow shame shows up differently in men and womenWhy rejection is often the hidden root of intimacy strugglesThe difference between emotional intimacy and physical connectionWhy desire changes over time — and why that’s not a bad hingHow hormones impact intimacy much earlier than we thinkWhat to do if sex is painful — and why pain is never “just normal”Why 30% of women report not knowing if they’ve ever orgasmedWhat “Stop having bad sex” really means — and how to redefine good sexHow to separate physical touch from sexual pressureWhy communication outside the bedroom is critical to connectionResources From This Episode:Books Mentioned:Come As You Are by Emily Nagoski - https://www.amazon.com/dp/1982165316?ref_=cm_sw_r_ffobk_cp_ud_dp_1BD8G05K00TMP8JC1B5W&bestFormat=trueMating in Captivity by Esther Perel - https://a.co/d/03fx0xKMThe 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman - https://www.amazon.com/dp/080241270X?ref_=cm_sw_r_ffobk_cp_ud_dp_YV385YN57H9RZRRVVMJR&bestFormat=true Professional Resources:American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors, andTherapists (AASECT) - https://www.aasect.org/Specialized Support:Pelvic floor therapy (for pain or discomfort during sex) - https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diseases/12325-dyspareunia-painful-intercourseHormone testing (advocate for comprehensive panels, even before menopause) - https://www.questhealth.com/product/menopause-perimenopause-assessment-test-panel/12570M.html?srsltid=AfmBOoqhXIiZLaCgjR_ecb-vFNCjNoYgTCzqKgCyiOwtpCrKrEfmb6yM Connect with Dr. Erin Murphy Ross:Website: ErinRossPhD.comPrivate practice in Texas Keep SparkingIf this conversation resonated with you:Follow Spark Me wherever you listen to podcasts so you never miss a Spark Short.Share this episode with a friend who’s ever whispered, “Is this normal?”Leave a rating or review — it helps other women in their second act find the show.Tag us when you’re listening and tell us:What’s one thing you wish we talked about more openly?
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    1 h et 5 min
  • The Problem Isn’t the Drugs

    The Problem Isn’t the Drugs
    Feb 18 2026

    What if addiction isn’t the problem — but the solution to something deeper?


    In this Spark Short, Liz and Michele revisit their powerful conversation with Brenda Zane of the Hope Stream community and unpack one of the most eye-opening reframes of the episode: substance use isn’t usually the root issue — it’s often a coping mechanism for underlying mental health struggles.


    They explore the “tip of the iceberg” analogy that resonated so deeply with listeners — how drugs and alcohol may be visible, but what lies beneath is often anxiety, depression, trauma (both big T and small t), divorce, bullying, or pain that parents never even knew existed.


    Liz and Michele also talk candidly about how different today’s landscape is from the one we grew up in. From highly potent THC to fentanyl-laced substances, the risks are greater and harder to detect than ever before. They share stories that are sobering, personal, and deeply relatable.


    Most importantly, they deliver a message every struggling parent needs to hear: this can happen in loving, stable families. It’s not a parenting failure. And connection — even in the hardest moments — may be the most powerful tool we have.


    This conversation is honest, compassionate, and ultimately hopeful.


    In This Episode You’ll Learn:

    • Why substance use is often a coping mechanism — not the core problem
    • The “hot stove” analogy that reframes why kids continue using
    • The difference between big T and small t trauma
    • Why today’s drug landscape is dramatically different from past generations
    • How mental health struggles often start younger than we expect
    • Why high-achieving, “great kids” can still be suffering silently
    • The role connection plays in recovery
    • Why parents must stop blaming themselves
    • How communities like Hope Stream provide support and guidance


    Resources From This Episode:

    • Hope Stream Community - https://hopestreamcommunity.org/
    • Brenda Zane’s Podcast & Parent Support Resources - https://hopestreamcommunity.org/hopestream-podcast/


    Keep Sparking

    If this conversation resonated with you:

    Follow Spark Me wherever you listen to podcasts so you never miss a Spark Short.

    Share this episode with a parent who may need hope, reassurance, or understanding.

    Leave a rating or review — it helps other women in their second act discover the show.

    Tag us when you’re listening and tell us:

    What was your biggest takeaway from this conversation?
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    29 min
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