When we talk about hormones and women’s sexual health, the focus is almost always on estrogen. But testosterone also plays a key role in desire, arousal, and overall sexual well-being. Despite being labeled a “male hormone,” women produce (and need) it too. In this episode, we separate myth from fact about testosterone in women and why it remains one of the most overlooked topics in sexual medicine.

I am joined once again by Dr. Maria Sophocles, a board-certified OB/GYN and Menopause Society Certified Practitioner. She is the CMO of EMBR Labs, a Boston-based wellness device company. Maria is also author of the new book, The Bedroom Gap, which is all about sex at midlife.

Some of the specific topics we explore in this episode include:

• What testosterone does in women’s bodies and sex lives
• How levels change across the lifespan
• When testosterone may help menopausal symptoms
• Potential risks and side effects
• Why there’s still no FDA-approved testosterone treatment for women

To learn more about Maria’s work, you can check out her website.

Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology.

***

Thank you to our sponsors!

Soaking Wet from VB Health is the world’s first probiotic specifically designed for vaginal and vulva health and wellness. It’s a doctor formulated blend of prebiotics, probiotics, and vitamins specifically designed to restore balance and increase lubrication. Visit vb.health and use code JUSTIN for 10% off.

The Kinsey Institute is where the world turns to understand sex and relationships. You can help continue its expert-led research by donating to the Kinsey Institute Research Fund. Learn more and make a donation here: https://give.myiu.org/centers-institutes/I380010749.html

***

Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram.

Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!

Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.

For many women, the menopause transition brings painful sex and low libido—issues that have long been endured in silence. Meanwhile, men have had access to highly effective sexual performance treatments for decades. The result is what my guest calls the bedroom gap: the widening divide in sexual expectations and capabilities between men and women in midlife.

I am joined by Dr. Maria Sophocles, a board-certified OB/GYN and Menopause Society Certified Practitioner. She is the CMO of EMBR Labs, a Boston-based wellness device company. Maria is also author of the new book, The Bedroom Gap, which is all about sex at midlife.

Some of the specific topics we explore in this episode include:

• Defining the bedroom gap
• The often overlooked sexual effects of menopause
• How Viagra widened the divide at midlife
• Barriers to treatment for women’s sexual health
• How to close the bedroom gap

To learn more about Maria’s work, you can check out her website.

Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology.

***

Thank you to our sponsors!

Wrap the ones you love in luxury with Cozy Earth. Share a little extra love this February and wrap yourself—or someone you care about—in comfort that truly feels special. Head to cozyearth.com and use my code JUSTIN for up to 20% off.

Soaking Wet from VB Health is the world’s first probiotic specifically designed for vaginal and vulva health and wellness. It’s a doctor formulated blend of prebiotics, probiotics, and vitamins specifically designed to restore balance and increase lubrication. Visit vb.health and use code JUSTIN for 10% off.

Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today.

***

Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram.

Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!

Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.

When people think about great sex, they often picture what happens at the peak (i.e., the orgasm). But what if we stopped thinking about pleasure as a single moment and, instead viewed it as a cycle? In today’s episode, we’re going to explore the three phases of the pleasure cycle–wanting, liking, and learning–and discuss how cultivating each of them can transform your sex life.

I am joined once again by Dr. Nicole McNichols, an Associate Teaching Professor in the Department of Psychology at the University of Washington. Nicole’s course, “The Diversity of Human Sexuality,” is the largest and most popular course in the university’s history with four thousand enrolled students each year. Nicole is author of the new book You Could Be Having Better Sex.

Some of the specific topics we explore include:

• How does connection to your own erotic self shape attraction to your partner?
• What happens in each phase of the pleasure cycle?
• How does modern life disrupt desire and dopamine?
• How can we leverage the power of anticipation to build more pleasure?

You can check out Nicole’s website to learn more about her work.

Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology.

***

Thank you to our sponsors!

With Erika Lust, you get more than porn. You get real intimacy. Real stories. Get 45% off all subscription plans at erikalust.com when you use the code JUSTIN.

The Kinsey Institute is where the world turns to understand sex and relationships. You can help continue its expert-led research by donating to the Kinsey Institute Research Fund. Learn more and make a donation here: https://give.myiu.org/centers-institutes/I380010749.html

***

Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram.

Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!

Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.

Most people think of sexual consent as a simple yes-or-no question. But it’s rarely that clear-cut. In this episode, we unpack why consent is about more than permission, how power and context shape sexual choices, and what it means to build experiences that feel mutual, ethical, and genuinely good for everyone involved.

My guest is Dr. Nicole McNichols. She is an Associate Teaching Professor in the Department of Psychology at the University of Washington. Nicole’s course, “The Diversity of Human Sexuality,” is the largest and most popular course in the university’s history with four thousand enrolled students each year. Nicole is author of the new book You Could Be Having Better Sex.

Some of the specific topics we explore include:

• What are we getting wrong about sexual consent, and what’s missing from the way we typically define it?
• What does “intentional awareness” actually look like in a sexual encounter?
• Why does honesty about your motivations matter just as much as a verbal yes?
• Should pleasure be considered a core part of consent? If so, why?
• How can we practice consent not just as a rule to follow, but as a relational and erotic skill that makes sex better?

You can check out Nicole’s website to learn more about her work.

Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology.

***

Thank you to our sponsors!

With Erika Lust, you get more than porn. You get real intimacy. Real stories. Get 45% off all subscription plans at erikalust.com when you use the code JUSTIN.

Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today.

***

Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram.

Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!

Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.

Knowing someone loves you is one thing. Actually feeling that love in your body and daily life is another—and that’s where many relationships get stuck. In this episode, we move from problem to solution, exploring five research-backed mindsets that help love land and deepen real connection.

I am joined once again by Dr. Sonja Lyubomirsky, a Distinguished Professor of Psychology at the University of California, Riverside and author of the best-selling books The How of Happiness and The Myths of Happiness. Her latest book, co-authored with Dr. Harry Reis, is titled How To Feel Loved: The Five Mindsets That Get You More Of What Matters Most.

Some of the specific topics we explore in this episode include:

• How does the “Relationship Sea-Saw” explain the give-and-take of feeling loved?
• What does healthy self-disclosure actually look like in a relationship?
• How can couples sustain curiosity in long-term partnerships?
• How can we approach our relationships with more compassion and less scorekeeping?
• How can we learn to become better listeners and stop having repetitive conflicts?

To learn more about How to Feel Loved, click here.

Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology.

***

Thank you to our sponsors!

Wrap the ones you love in luxury with Cozy Earth. Share a little extra love this February and wrap yourself—or someone you care about—in comfort that truly feels special. Head to cozyearth.com and use my code JUSTIN for up to 20% off.

If you’re ready to ditch the shady stuff and choose a libido supplement that’s effective and that you can feel confident about, it’s time to check out Drive Boost. Visit vb.health and use code JUSTIN for 10% off.

The Kinsey Institute is where the world turns to understand sex and relationships. You can help continue its expert-led research by donating to the Kinsey Institute Research Fund. Learn more and make a donation here: https://give.myiu.org/centers-institutes/I380010749.html

***

Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram.

Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!

Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.

You can be deeply loved—and still not feel it. In this episode, we’re exploring the gap between being loved and feeling loved, the myths that keep love from landing, and how modern life can amplify disconnection. If you’ve ever felt unseen, insecure, or lonely inside an otherwise good relationship, this conversation will help you understand why, and what you can do about it.

My guest is Dr. Sonja Lyubomirsky, a Distinguished Professor of Psychology at the University of California, Riverside and author of the best-selling books The How of Happiness and The Myths of Happiness. Her latest book, co-authored with Dr. Harry Reis, is titled How To Feel Loved: The Five Mindsets That Get You More Of What Matters Most.

Some of the specific topics we explore in this episode include:

• Why do so many people struggle to feel loved, even when they clearly are?
• How can admiration and praise actually leave us feeling lonelier?
• Why does believing you have to “earn” love block you from experiencing it?
• What happens to our mental health, relationships, and desire when we don’t feel loved?
• How is modern technology undermining our sense of connection?

To learn more about How to Feel Loved, click here.

Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology.

***

Thank you to our sponsors!

If you’re ready to ditch the shady stuff and choose a libido supplement that’s effective and that you can feel confident about, it’s time to check out Drive Boost. Visit vb.health and use code JUSTIN for 10% off.

Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today.

***

Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram.

Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!

Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.

Limerence is an intense state of romantic preoccupation where someone takes over your thoughts and emotions. It can feel exhilarating and even spark new love. But it can also become unhealthy, especially when the feelings are unrequited, inappropriate, or tied to someone who is unavailable or toxic. In this episode, we explore when limerence becomes a problem, and how to work through it.

I am joined once again by Dr. Tom Bellamy, a neuroscientist and honorary Associate Professor at the University of Nottingham. He has published over forty scientific works on neurophysiology. He runs the popular blog Living with Limerence and is author of the new book Smitten: Romantic Obsession, the Neuroscience of Limerence, and How to Make Love Last.

Some of the specific topics we explore include:

• What keeps limerence going, and what do you need to understand before breaking the cycle?
• How do you shift into a recovery mindset?
• What practices help interrupt rumination?
• What should you look for in a therapist if you need help working through limerence?
• How does living more purposefully protect against limerence?

You can check out Tom’s website to learn more about his work.

Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology.

***

Thank you to our sponsors!

With Erika Lust, you get more than porn. You get real intimacy. Real stories. Get 45% off all subscription plans at erikalust.com when you use the code JUSTIN.

Wrap the ones you love in luxury with Cozy Earth. Discover bedtime bliss with Cozy Earth’s bamboo sheet set and loungewear. Using code JUSTIN to get 40% off your purchase.

Passionate about building a career in sexuality? Check out the Sexual Health Alliance. With SHA, you’ll connect with world-class experts and join an engaged community of sexuality professionals from around the world. Visit SexualHealthAlliance.com and start building the sexuality career of your dreams today.

***

Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram.

Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!

Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.

Have you ever been unable to stop thinking about someone? They’re the first thing on your mind when you wake up and the last before you fall asleep. When they text, you’re ecstatic. When they don’t, you feel deflated. That experience has a name: limerence. In this episode, we unpack what it is, where it comes from, and why the brain can become so powerfully attached to another person.

My guest is Dr. Tom Bellamy, a neuroscientist and honorary Associate Professor at the University of Nottingham. He has published over forty scientific works on neurophysiology. He runs the popular blog Living with Limerence and is author of the new book Smitten: Romantic Obsession, the Neuroscience of Limerence, and How to Make Love Last.

Some of the specific topics we explore include:

• How is limerence different from lust and love?
• What happens in the brain during limerence?
• Why does uncertainty fuel romantic obsession?
• Is modern dating making limerence more common?
• What emotional needs or life circumstances make someone more vulnerable to limerence?

You can check out Tom’s website to learn more about his work.

Got a sex question? Send me a podcast voicemail to have it answered on a future episode at speakpipe.com/sexandpsychology.

***

Thank you to our sponsors!

With Erika Lust, you get more than porn. You get real intimacy. Real stories. Get 45% off all subscription plans at erikalust.com when you use the code JUSTIN.

Firmtech’s Tech Ring will help you to track your sexual health–and keep it up. Visit myfirmtech.com/justinlehmiller and use code JUSTIN15 for 15% off your purchase.

Head to https://paired.com/JUSTIN and download the #1 app for couples to start maintaining your lasting love today.

***

Want to learn more about Sex and Psychology? Click here for previous articles or follow the blog on Facebook, Twitter, or Bluesky to receive updates. You can also follow Dr. Lehmiller on YouTube and Instagram.

Listen and stream all episodes on Apple, Spotify, or Amazon. Subscribe to automatically receive new episodes and please rate and review the podcast!

Credits: Precision Podcasting (Podcast editing) and Shutterstock/Florian (Music). Image created with Canva; photos used with permission of guest.