Most men think conflict is the problem. It’s not. The real damage happens in how we avoid it, rush through it, or let it spiral when emotions spike.

This episode breaks down why difficult conversations with your wife feel so charged—and how learning to manage yourself in those moments changes everything. Conflict isn’t something to eliminate. It’s where trust gets built when you handle it well.

Highlights

• Why avoiding hard conversations only makes them heavier later
• The three ways men typically mishandle conflict: avoidance, escape, escalation
• The relationship cycle every marriage runs through—whether you like it or not
• How being “right” kills repair and connection
• The green / blue / red zones and what happens when you leave center
• Why trying to fix her emotions backfires
• A simple listening tool that stops arguments from spinning

Practical takeaways

• Notice when you’re triggered and pause before engaging
• Stay emotionally centered so you can actually hear her
• Focus on repair, not winning or ending the conversation fast

Conflict is unavoidable. Repair is a skill.
Listen in, then pay attention to the next hard conversation you want to avoid—and do it differently.

Your calendar already tells the truth about your priorities.
This episode is about using that truth to shape the year ahead—on purpose.

Most men stop at reflection. They do a year-end review, get clear on what mattered, and feel good about the insight. Then nothing changes. In this short follow-up, Tommy breaks down the missing step: deciding the next action and putting it on the calendar so it actually happens.

In this episode:

• Why insight without action quietly keeps you stuck
• The difference between wanting change and planning for it
• How one calendar entry can shift your relationships, business, or health
• Real examples: brothers’ trips, client strategy, training plans, and family time
• Why discomfort is often the signal you’re doing the right thing

Practical takeaways:

• Choose one insight from your year-end review and name the very next action
• Assign that action a specific date and time
• Let your calendar reflect what matters to you—not just what’s demanded of you

Look at your calendar for the year ahead. If it doesn’t show what you say is important, change it. That’s how different years are built.

For high-achieving men, effort is rarely the issue. Most are working hard, carrying responsibility at work and at home, and trying to show up well. The problem is alignment. Without clear planning, even disciplined men end up reacting to their weeks instead of directing them. This episode of The Durable Dad Podcast focuses on calendar-based planning as a practical leadership skill.

If you don’t pause to review your year, you don’t actually start a new one—you just drag old pressure forward. You already review your business. Numbers. Calendars. What worked and what didn’t.

This episode shows you how to apply that same discipline to your life—so your time, energy, and attention are spent where they matter most.

In this episode, we cover:

• Why skipping a personal review causes you to repeat the same patterns
• How pressure-based goals quietly drain energy and motivation
• Using photos as data to reconnect with what actually mattered last year
• What your calendar reveals about stress, relationships, and priorities
• A four-step year-end review you can complete in one sitting
• How reflection creates vision—and why vision changes how you show up at home

Practical takeaways:

• Block two uninterrupted hours and treat your life like you treat your business
• Use photos and calendar entries as information, not nostalgia
• Set goals from clarity and appreciation, not urgency or scarcity
• If you want 2026 to feel different, you have to look back before you move forward.
• Drop the pressure. Get clear. Then lead your year on purpose.

DOWNLOAD THE FREE YEAR END REVIEW - drop your email and get the step by step process I've used to optimize my life.

This episode is especially relevant for men focused on leadership—at work, at home, and in their community. Strong men’s leadership isn’t about doing more or pushing harder. It’s about clarity, self-awareness, and making intentional decisions with your time and energy.

When a man leads himself well, he leads his family better and shows up with steadiness at work. The year-end review process shared here helps men step out of reactive leadership and into grounded, intentional leadership.

It’s a practical tool for fathers, husbands, and high-performing professionals who want to reduce stress, strengthen their marriage, and model healthy leadership for their kids. Leadership starts with reflection—and this is where it begins.