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One blueberry lemon drop in, and suddenly, we’re reflecting on the past six months like we’re in an A24 film. We’re talking New Year’s resolution updates, accidental breakthroughs, and how Kate is now emotionally color-coordinated. Also: season 2 sneak peeks, iconic lost vlogs, and yes—we still cry to old road trip footage.

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Kate got a new car, Lyss got new holes in her tires, and we both got emotionally wrecked by a peach Sauvignon Blanc concoction. Plus: our pre-finale Love Island predictions and a formal love letter to Amaya Papaya!

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We hosted a sleepover and accidentally summoned chaos. We snacked, we sipped on Sleepy Sluts, and we spiraled. Jaylen has our hearts, Olandria is our queen, and Sabrina Carpenter might’ve broken the internet (again). We discuss album cover drama, AI Bigfoot, AI Barbie, and whatever else came out of our unwell little brains. No structure, just delusion and love island vibes.

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Leather seats are attacking us, we’re lowkey spiraling about turning 30, and Color Guard was our villain origin story. We’re in our mermaid era, obsessed with Addison Rae again, and booking Florida trips for a single latte and a whiff of body spray. It’s unhinged. It’s on brand.

Oh — and Buzzfeed says we’re the final girls in a slasher summer.

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It’s Father’s Day week! We found out which dad we serve, consider quitting everything, and possibly starting witchery. One of us met a man. One of us gave money to Co–Star. Guess who.

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This week, we let astrology.com psychoanalyze us so you don't have to. Lyss is moody, Kate's aggressively into acts of service, and apparently the stars think we're a match made in spin class. We unpack our sun, moon, and rising signs, test our friendship compatibility, and yes-coffee was involved. And yes-Kate got competitive. Again.

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We kept it short this week, but the drama is intact. A roach tried to eat us, Kevin turned out to be Paul, and we believe in Shane Harper slander. Consider this your weekly chaos update. Also: Haley, blink twice if you need help.