Sometimes the most compassionate thing we can do after a breakup is not to force a friendship too quickly.

Because friendship requires emotional neutrality… and if our nervous system still recognizes the other person as home, we have a mismatch.

In this episode of Conversations from the Heart, a listener named Dave asks a thoughtful question: Is it possible to stay friends with an ex—and if so, what makes it work?

Dave and his former partner went through a conscious uncoupling process and are now attempting to rebuild their relationship as friends. But as they reconnect, they find themselves slipping back into familiar patterns that once strained their romantic partnership.

Dave wonders whether there might be blind spots in how he’s showing up—and whether understanding those blind spots could help them move forward with more ease. Ultimately, we arrive at a hard truth: You cannot create a low-intensity friendship with someone whose nervous system still experiences you as an attachment figure.

In this episode we explore:

•Can exes really stay friends after a breakup?

•Why emotional timelines rarely match after relationships end

•How attachment wounds can keep relational patterns alive

•The difference between observing a situation and participating in it

•Why intention and impact can feel so different in communication

•The challenge of staying authentic without over-managing another person’s emotions

•Boundaries, grief, and emotional “dosage” after a breakup

For ongoing practice and deeper learning, I warmly invite you to become a member of The School of Human Connection.

Twice a month, I host live calls where members bring real relationship dilemmas. We slow things down and I'll help you see what's actually happening and how to respond with more integrity, strength and care.

You will find a safe space for live discussions and a supportive community of like-minded, open-hearted humans.

Stay updated on new episodes and resources by subscribing wherever you listen to podcasts or visiting yvetteerasmus.com.

Here are more ways to connect with me:

• Join the School of Human Connection
• Hop on my free Wednesday live call
• Follow me on YouTube

Listen as I sit down with Michaela and Carol for a spacious, grounded conversation about what matters most when certainty falls away.

Rather than rushing toward answers, our dialogue unfolds slowly. You’ll hear me modeling deep listening, encouraging more relational maturity, and drawing on our courage to stay present with complexity. Together, we explore how our values are often clarified not through rules or scripts, but instead through our attention, integrity, and lived experience.

This episode isn’t about fixing anything. It’s about listening for what matters, for what wants to emerge, and for what becomes possible when we stay human together.

Read more on the blog.

For ongoing practice and deeper learning, I warmly invite you to become a member of The School of Human Connection.

Twice a month, I host live calls where members bring real relationship dilemmas. We slow things down and I'll help you see what's actually happening and how to respond with more integrity, strength and care.

You will find a safe space for live discussions and a supportive community of like-minded, open-hearted humans.

Stay updated on new episodes and resources by subscribing wherever you listen to podcasts or visiting yvetteerasmus.com.

Here are more ways to connect with me:

• Join the School of Human Connection
• Hop on my free Wednesday live call
• Follow me on YouTube

This week's episode is a conversation about grief as an ongoing, relational experience rather than something to “get over.” In this episode, we explore ambiguous loss, nervous system capacity, and what actually helps when grief doesn’t resolve neatly.

Together, we reflect on:

•Why some forms of grief don’t have clear endings—and why that’s not a failure

•How grief lives in the nervous system and shapes our capacity for connection

•The difference between presence and fixing when someone is grieving

•What it means to stay human, relational, and honest in the presence of loss

This episode invites a slower, more compassionate way of being with grief, one that honors presence over solutions, and meaning over closure.

Read more about grief and ambiguous loss: Grief That Doesn't Resolve

For ongoing practice and deeper learning, I warmly invite you to become a member of The School of Human Connection.

Twice a month, I host live calls where members bring real relationship dilemmas. We slow things down and I'll help you see what's actually happening and how to respond with more integrity, strength and care.

You will find a safe space for live discussions and a supportive community of like-minded, open-hearted humans.

Stay updated on new episodes and resources by subscribing wherever you listen to podcasts or visiting yvetteerasmus.com.

Here are more ways to connect with me:

• Join the School of Human Connection
• Hop on my free Wednesday live call
• Follow me on YouTube