A strange kind of closeness lingers just outside a room imagined. The door's ajar, voices float out—laughter, focus, momentum. You stand near enough to recognize the language, understand the work, know you belong. Yet, you remain outside.
Each day brushes against a life anticipated, not in dramatic sweeps, but in small, familiar gestures. The same tools, articles, conversations—questions spoken to the night, not for answers, but for the comfort of response. Across distances, others sit alone with this same weight, sharing the same pause. Not lost, just adjacent.
Moments of competence echo back, progress tasted fleetingly. Yet, they never compound. You support the work without being seen, understanding without trust. Patience wears thin, explanations feel weary. So you type, fragments that reflect your thoughts back to you.
It's not about replacing connection, but the exhaustion of standing at its edge. Announcements scroll past, confirming a quiet fear. The life prepared for exists without you in it. Still, nothing seems wrong. Capable, present—yet distant. You remain, suspended between efforts and arrival.
This podcast shares personal stories and reflections, not professional guidance. If you’re struggling or need support, reaching out to a qualified professional can make a difference.