TITLE:

Intention vs. Impact: How to Apologize and Give Grace

SHORT DESCRIPTION (for apps and search):

Most of us don't mean to hurt anyone, but our words can still land the wrong way. Stacey C. talks about intention vs. impact, how to apologize well, and how to extend grace when you're the one who was hurt.

EPISODE SUMMARY:

Welcome back to the U Grow Girl Podcast! After a little break (life has been life-ing), I'm back with a topic that has been on my heart: intention vs. impact.

I don't believe most people wake up and set out to hurt anybody. But the impact of our words can still be negative, even when our hearts were good. In this episode, I share a personal moment with my daughter where her tone stung, why my first instinct wasn't graceful, and what I learned when I came back to the conversation with curiosity instead of a comeback.

We talk about why the gap between what we mean and what people hear happens, how to own your impact without shame, and how to speak up with love when you're the one who was hurt.

IN THIS EPISODE:

- Why meaning well isn't the same as landing well

- A real moment where tone was misread, and what changed once we talked

- Why the gap happens: history, tone and timing, rushing to fix, and the double standard we give ourselves

- Why the people closest to us often get our worst tone

- Texts, comments, and the tone we can't hear

- Why both things can be true: good intentions and hurtful impact

- How to apologize without the "but"

- How to speak up with love when you've been hurt

- The words we speak over ourselves

- The Grow Girl Checklist: Pause, Ask, Check In, Repair, Extend Grace

KEY TAKEAWAYS:

- Intention is what's in my heart. Impact is what's felt in yours.

- People can't see our intentions. They can only experience our impact.

- Grace and accountability belong together.

- Try this apology: "I can see how that landed. Thank you for telling me. I'm sorry."

- Try this when you're hurt: "I know you probably didn't mean it that way, but here's how it landed for me."

THE GROW GIRL CHECKLIST:

1. Pause. Will this help, or just make me feel better for saying it?

2. Ask. "Do you want advice, or do you want me to listen?"

3. Check in. "Did that come across the way I meant it?"

4. Repair. Own it quickly, without excuses.

5. Extend grace. Both ways.

SCRIPTURE MENTIONED:

- Ephesians 4:32

REFLECTION QUESTIONS:

- Is there a conversation where I need to own my impact?

- Is there someone whose heart I need to give the benefit of the doubt?

- Is there someone I need to gently tell, "Here's how that landed for me"?

- How are my words shaping the way I talk to myself?

JOIN THE CONVERSATION:

Has your intention ever missed the mark, or have you been on the receiving end? Send me a DM and share this episode with someone who needs the reminder.

Follow U Grow Girl Podcast:

Website: ugrowgirlpodcast.com

TikTok: @ugrowgirlpod

Threads: @ugrowgirlpodcast

If this episode encouraged you, please subscribe, leave a rating and review, and share it with a friend.

No timelines, just evolution.

TAGS:

intention vs impact, impact of words, how to apologize, giving grace, healthy communication, relationships, faith and relationships, women's podcast, personal growth, U Grow Girl Podcast

Stacey is joined by returning guests Ondreea and Courtney for a fan-centered conversation and reactions to the BTS Arirang World Tour, including surprise songs, member performances, and fan engagement. They also explore the impact of fandom on mental health and emotional well-being. The conversation covers a range of topics related to BTS, including their music, concerts, ticket prices, and stage presence. The hosts discuss their preferences for BTS songs, their experiences at BTS concerts, and their thoughts on the band's fashion and stage performance. The conversation covers the topics of fan engagement, para-social relationships, and disappointment with idols. It also delves into the challenges faced by black K-pop fans and the impact of cultural appropriation. The discussion highlights the importance of setting boundaries and taking accountability for one's actions. The conversation covers a wide range of topics, from surprising stage moments to the role of K-pop in emotional healing. It delves into the impact of comfort music, the support of fan communities, and the importance of mental health awareness.

Takeaways

• Fandom is a deep connection and community that impacts mental health.
• The BTS Arirang World Tour included surprise songs and member performances that delighted fans. BTS fans have diverse preferences for the band's songs, with some expressing dislike for certain tracks like 'Permission to Dance.'
• Ticket prices for BTS concerts vary, with some fans finding low-priced tickets for certain shows.
• The hosts appreciate BTS's stage presence and fashion choices, with a particular focus on Jimin's hair and the band's overall styling. Para-social relationships in K-pop create a one-sided connection between fans and idols.
• Healthy fan engagement involves setting boundaries and respecting the personal lives of idols.
• Disappointment with idols can arise from scandals, cultural appropriation, and offensive behavior.
• Black K-pop fans face challenges of anti-blackness, cultural appropriation, and disappointment with idols.
• Idols and companies should take accountability for their actions and set clear boundaries with fans. K-pop serves as a powerful emotional outlet and coping mechanism for many fans.
• Fan communities play a crucial role in supporting K-pop idols through real-life mental health struggles.

Chapters

• 00:00 The Impact of Fandom on Mental Health
• 02:00 The BTS Arirang World Tour Experience
• 19:06 BTS Songs and Preferences
• 19:51 Concert Experiences and Ticket Prices
• 36:21 Stage Presence and Fashion
• 40:30 Para-social Relationships in K-Pop
• 42:00 Challenges Faced by Black K-Pop Fans
• 53:03 Disappointment with Idols and Cultural Appropriation
• 58:00 Setting Boundaries and Taking Accountability
• 01:09:30 Surprising Stage Moments
• 01:10:17 K-pop as an Emotional Outlet
• 01:11:20 Comfort Music and Coping Mechanisms
• 01:28:09 Supporting K-pop Idols Through Mental Health Struggles

Connect with U Grow Girl Podcast:

• Website: www.ugrowgirlpodcast.com
• Instagram: @ugrowgirlpodcast
• TikTok: @ugrowgirlpod

In this episode, Stacey discusses the grief of losing someone who is still alive, family estrangement, friendship loss, and the challenges of maintaining adult friendships. She shares personal experiences and insights, offering validation and guidance to those experiencing similar situations.

Takeaways

• Grieving Someone Who Is Still Alive
• Family Estrangement
• Friendship Loss
• Maintaining Adult Friendships

Chapters

• 00:00 Grieving Someone Who Is Still Alive
• 04:12 Family Estrangement
• 14:18 Friendship Loss
• 22:08 Maintaining Adult Friendships

Resources & Links:

• Book about grief and healing (search for top titles relevant to relational grief)
• Dr. Maya Angelou quote – Embrace change and growth
• Therapist directories for local support
• Faith-based grief support organizations

Connect with U Grow Girl Podcast:

• Website: www.ugrowgirlpodcast.com
• Instagram: @ugrowgirlpodcast
• TikTok: @ugrowgirlpod

In this deeply personal episode, Courtney shares her journey through childhood abuse, healing, and resilience. Her story offers hope, clarity, and practical insights for women walking the path of recovery from trauma. If you're seeking empowerment and understanding, this conversation is a must-listen. Main Topics:

• Childhood abuse and recognizing that trauma is not your fault
• The importance of boundaries and healing in family dynamics
• How faith and vulnerability foster growth and community
• Practical steps for managing triggers and emotional well-being
• The ongoing journey of forgiveness and self-love

In this episode:

• Courtney recounts her childhood experiences, including the trauma inflicted by relatives
• She discusses the complexities of shame, guilt, and forgiveness
• Courtney shares her healing process—whether through therapy or personal faith
• She talks about establishing boundaries with family members and predators
• Courtney emphasizes the significance of vulnerability in connecting and healing
• Insights on how God's words affirm her worth despite her trauma
• Practical advice for women still silenced by shame and fear

  Timestamps: 00:00 - Welcome episode: confronting abuse, trauma, and healing

  02:02 - Courtney's motivation to share her story publicly

  04:45 - Defining abuse and its impact on women’s self-perception

  10:59 - Recognizing when abuse was not okay and understanding it’s not your fault

  16:16 - The moment Courtney realized she needed help and spoke up

  22:40 - Re-living childhood trauma and family dynamics

  28:28 - The effects of ongoing sexual abuse and building boundaries

  36:11 - The power of vulnerability and community in healing

  43:42 - How God’s Word affirms Courtney’s worth and identity

  50:04 - The importance of boundaries with family and loved ones

  58:15 - The slow, non-linear process of healing and forgiveness

  64:01 - Therapy, faith, and healing as ongoing tools

  70:01 - Reconnecting with herself and her body post-assault

  78:30 - The impact of trauma on perception of men and relationships

  85:13 - The significance of God’s words in her healing journey

  88:28 - The ongoing battle with shame and how to lay it down

  93:44 - Advice for women who haven’t told anyone about their trauma

  100:00 - The message of hope: community, healing, and purpose

  107:05 - What God is doing in Courtney now—wings or a safe landing

  113:11 - Embracing individuality and the power of being authentically “weird”

  118:30 - Connecting with Courtney

  Resources & Links:

• Rainn National Sexual Assault Hotline — Call 1-800-656-HOPE (4673) for confidential support

Connect with Courtney:

• Instagram: Courtney Saw That
• Email: Jones87courtney@gmail.com

Connect with U Grow Girl Podcast:

• Website: www.ugrowgirlpodcast.com
• Instagram: @ugrowgirlpodcast
• TikTok: @ugrowgirlpod

The conversation delves into the journey of Pastor Lisa Jacobs as she shares the inspiration behind her devotional, the process of becoming an author, and the impact of rejection and self-perception. It also explores the core message of the devotional, the importance of making time for God, and the power of words in healing and transformation. The conversation covers the three-part structure of the book, addressing unanswered prayers and waiting on God, overcoming imposter syndrome, taking a step in bold faith, speaking your truth, and the impact of the devotional in the community. It also delves into the horizon and future initiatives of the author.

Takeaways

• The power of words in healing
• The importance of making time for God Unanswered prayers are often preparation for something greater.
• Imposter syndrome can be overcome by affirming God's truth about one's value and purpose.

Chapters

• 00:00 The Birth of a Devotional
• 07:16 The Fear and Transparency of Writing
• 14:24 Choosing Topics and Addressing Trauma
• 20:11 Meeting Women in Different Stages of Trauma
• 28:13 Rejection and Self-Perception
• 40:21 The Impact of Seeking God Daily
• 48:26 Taking a Step in Bold Faith
• 01:06:09 Impact of the Devotional in the Community
• 01:13:02 The Horizon and Future Initiatives

Resources & Links:

• Not Easily Broken by Lisa D. Jacobs
• Lisa Jacobs on Instagram
• Lisa Jacobs on Facebook
• The Purpose Driven Life by Rick Warren

Connect with Lisa Jacobs:

• Instagram - PlatinumLife63
• Facebook - Lisa D. Jacobs

Follow U Grow Girl Podcast:

• Instagram - @ugrowgirlpodcast
• TikTok - @ugrowgirlpod

Discover how men can elevate their skincare game in this insightful episode featuring skincare expert Askia Underwood. From ingredients to routines, learn practical tips to achieve clear, healthy skin regardless of gender. Perfect for men just starting out or looking to level up their skincare regimen.

Takeaways

• Skincare routine for men
• Best skincare ingredients for men
• Shaving and skincare
• Dark spot correction and hyperpigmentation
• Diet and water intake for skin health Importance of spirituality and stress management for overall wellness
• The impact of nutrition and supplements on longevity and overall health
• The significance of sleep and its effects on mental and physical well-being
• The role of skincare and sunscreen in addressing hyperpigmentation and skin health Skincare for men and women
• Scalp care and hair health
• The importance of sleep and stress on skin health

Chapters

• 00:00 Men's Skincare Routine
• 05:26 Sensitive and Acne-Prone Skin
• 16:26 Beard Care and Shaving
• 25:38 SPF and Moisturizer
• 31:21 Holistic Wellness: Spirituality, Nutrition, and Longevity
• 36:25 Nutrition, Supplements, and Gut Health
• 47:01 Skincare, Serums, and Dark Spot Correction
• 55:05 Sunscreen and K-Beauty for Men
• 01:04:28 Skincare for Men and Women

01:23:58 The Importance of Sleep and Stress on Skin Health

Resources & Links

• 4AM Skin - Minimalist Skincare
• Mixsoon - K-Beauty Tech
• Dr Groot - Scalp & Hair Serums
• The Ordinary - AHA BHA Exfoliant
• Skin 1004 - K-Beauty for skin barrier
• Vitamins & Supplements - NAD & Magnesium
• Aloe Derma Organic Aloe
• Plus Non-White Cast Sunscreens

Connect with Askia Underwood:

• Instagram: Skintelligencia
• TikTok: @skintelligencia
• YouTube Channel

Connect with U Grow Girl Podcast:

• Instagram: ugrowgirlpodcast
• TikTok: @ugrowgirlpod

Join Stacey and Askia Underwood, a skincare expert, as they explore holistic health and skincare. Discover practical routines, ingredient insights, and dietary tips to enhance your natural glow and well-being.

Takeaways:

• Skincare as a Ritual
• Understanding Skincare Ingredients K-Beauty products for the body
• Shower care as self-care Gut health and skin health are directly correlated
• The gut-brain-skin axis is a significant factor in skin health Personalized Supplements
• Skincare Confidence

Chapters

• 00:00 The Importance of Skincare as a Ritual
• 11:11 The Role of Exfoliation in Skincare
• 19:10 The Impact of Sunscreen on Skincare
• 32:21 Korean Skincare and Brand Recommendations
• 56:01 Shower Care as Self-Care
• 01:19:06 The Connection Between Gut Health and Skin Health
• 01:24:27 The Power of Personalized Supplements
• 01:42:09 The Impact of Skincare on Confidence

Resources & Links:

• SKIN1004
• Anua
• Cosrx Snail Mucin Serum
• Glow Getter Multi Oil Body Wash by Naturium
• OPositiv probiotics
• APRILSKIN

Connect with Askia Underwood:

• TikTok- Skintelligencia
• Instagram - Skintelligencia
• YouTube - Skintelligencia

Follow U Grow Girl Podcast:

• TikTok - @ugrowgirlpodcast
• Instagram - @ugrowgirlpodcast

In this episode, Dr. Tiana Polite Brown, an expert in lymphatic and pelvic health, breaks down complex conditions like lymphedema and pelvic floor dysfunction, emphasizing their impact on quality of life and management strategies. Whether you're dealing with symptoms or want to learn preventative care, this conversation sheds light on often overlooked issues and empowers listeners to advocate for their health.

Timestamps:

00:00 - Introduction to the episode and guest background
02:34 - Basics of lymphedema and lymphatic system function
04:53 - Symptoms, management, and misconceptions about lymphedema
06:21 - How lymphedema develops and common triggers, especially in women
08:39 - Impact of cancer treatment, surgery, and trauma on lymphatic health
12:30 - Genetic components and preventability of lymphedema
15:16 - The importance of second opinions and self-advocacy
18:02 - Why Dr. Brown is passionate about lymphedema care
20:45 - Daily management of lymphedema and self-care tips
24:32 - Emotional and social effects of living with chronic swelling
28:35 - Adjustments in clothing and lifestyle to cope with lymphedema
30:52 - Starting at-home care and when to see a specialist
33:20 - The significance of proper measurement and compression fit
35:34 - Emerging treatments and interventions for lymphedema
39:02 - Pelvic floor dysfunction: what it is and who it affects
41:24 - Commonality, causes, and misconceptions about pelvic health issues
42:49 - Differentiating between weak and tight pelvic floor muscles
44:12 - Why pelvic health issues are normalized but treatable
45:54 - Overcoming embarrassment and seeking help for pelvic issues
47:54 - Symptoms, causes, and when to seek pelvic floor therapy
51:40 - Duration and types of pelvic health therapy
55:01 - It's never too late to address pelvic floor problems
56:27 - Connection between lymphatic and pelvic health
58:39 - The importance of body literacy in understanding your health
60:15 - What OBGYNs should discuss more openly
66:30 - Personal updates and closing thoughts

Connect with Dr. Tiana Polite Brown:

• Website
• Instagram
• Facebook

Connect with U Grow Girl Podcast:

• Website
• Instagram
• TikTok