240. The Terms and Conditions That Quietly Shape Your Life

Today’s episode is a conversation with Amy Goldmacher about her recently published memoir, Terms and Conditions, and the personal history behind its unusual structure. The conversation centers on how grief, anxiety, perfectionism, and family dynamics can shape the way we show up in life and work, and why making those patterns visible can be deeply freeing.

We discuss Amy’s path from anthropology to publishing to memoir writing, plus the second-person, alphabetical structure that makes the book stand out. Sue also connects the book’s ideas to leadership, visibility, and the workplace, making this especially useful for anyone who tends to over-function, over-prepare, or stay behind the scenes.

Key topics

• Amy Goldmacher’s background in anthropology and publishing
  • She studied anthropology because she wanted to understand why people do what they do.
  • She later worked in academic publishing, editorial marketing, and sales before returning to graduate study in anthropology.
  • Around 2019, she felt the urge to write her own story.
• How Terms and Conditions came to be
  • Amy originally tried writing the memoir as a traditional chronological narrative.
  • Feedback from book coach colleagues and writing friends pushed her to rethink the structure.
  • She broke the manuscript into smaller pieces, assigned each a one-word title, and realized an alphabetical format could work.
• Why the book is so personal
  • A major motivation was loneliness around her father’s death when she was 20.
  • She also writes about anxiety and the experience of keeping difficult emotions hidden.
  • Her goal was to help other people feel less alone.
• The role of vulnerability and visibility
  • Amy describes the challenge of deciding what to share publicly.
  • She talks about having to build a visibility plan ahead of publication.
  • Posting photos and talking about the book repeatedly helped her feel more connected to the work and message.
• How childhood patterns show up later in life
  • Sue highlights sections on anxiety, control, suffering, and responsibility.
  • Amy reflects on how relationships helped her see that not everyone shares her assumptions.
  • A key insight is learning that discomfort is information, not something always requiring a fix.
• What it means to stop carrying other people’s emotions
  • The conversation explores the difference between what is yours to manage and what belongs to others.
  • Amy says that learning this boundary was a major turning point.
  • Sue connects this to parenting, marriage, and leadership.
• Visibility for introverts and quieter communicators
  • Amy says visibility is possible even with a quieter style.
  • She does not think she needs to become someone louder or more performative.
  • Instead, she is focusing on speaking to a specific audience with a clear message.
• Legacy and the book’s central message
  • Amy says she wants the book’s message to endure: the terms and conditions we grew up with do not have to determine the rest of our lives.
  • The final sections emphasize agency, acceptance, and discernment.
  • Both Sue and Amy stress that people can change even if their early conditioning was powerful.

Book that Amy recommends: Serial FIxer by Leah Marone

Learn more about Amy and her new book – Terms and Conditions

Connect with Susan M. Barber

If this episode resonated with you, share it with another leader who would benefit!

You can connect with Susan M. Barber for coaching, leadership development, speaking engagements, and visibility strategy work focused on helping leaders become more influential, trusted, and impactful inside organizations. Check out my books, The Visibility Factor and Your Journey to Visibility Workbook!

https://susanmbarber.com

https://www.linkedin.com/in/susanbarbercoaching/

239. Can You Explain Your Strategy in Two Minutes?

Sue Barber shares a practical framework for turning complex strategy, projects, and programs into a short, clear message senior leaders can actually absorb. The episode focuses on how to speak with more clarity, create visibility, and position yourself as someone ready for the next step.

Key topics

• Why strategy communication matters for visibility and leadership readiness.
• She breaks down how to explain a project or program in about two minutes without getting lost in details.
• The core idea is to start with the big picture first, then move into the specifics.
• Sue shares five questions to structure a strategic update:
  • Where are we going?
  • Why are we going there?
  • What matters most?
  • What are we doing differently?
  • What does success look like?
• Senior leaders do not need every detail, but they do need the right context in a concise format.
• The importance of explaining the business reason behind the work, not just the task itself.
• The value of naming what is unique, innovative, risky, or different about the approach.
• Success criteria should be clear, whether measured by revenue, cost, quality, capability, or strategic outcomes.
• The episode closes by framing succinct communication as a way to demonstrate strategic thinking and build credibility.

Connect with Susan M. Barber

If this episode resonated with you, share it with another leader who would benefit!

You can connect with Susan M. Barber for coaching, leadership development, speaking engagements, and visibility strategy work focused on helping leaders become more influential, trusted, and impactful inside organizations. Check out my books, The Visibility Factor and Your Journey to Visibility Workbook!

https://susanmbarber.com

https://www.linkedin.com/in/susanbarbercoaching/

238. The 5 Questions Strategic Leaders Ask Before Making Big Decisions

Sue Barber shares a practical strategy 101 episode focused on the questions leaders should ask before making decisions. The episode is designed to help managers, project leads, and individual contributors slow down, think strategically, and avoid costly rework later. Barber shares a practical solo episode on how professionals can frame their work in more strategic language. The focus is on moving from describing activity and execution to showing business value, impact, and decision making. If you want stronger visibility with leadership, this episode is about changing how you think about, and talk about, your day-to-day work.

Key Takeaways

What are we trying to accomplish?

She explains this as a reset question that helps align the room on the actual decision or outcome.

• Asking the objective early can stop meetings from going in circles and prevent wasted time and money.

Why does it matter to the business?

Sue emphasizes evaluating revenue impact, cost impact, budget, staffing, and whether the work actually moves the business forward.

• She shares how broad business understanding, especially across functions like IT, helps leaders make stronger decisions.

What has to be true for us to succeed?

This question surfaces whether the right people, skills, scope, strategy, and plan are in place.

• She notes that projects often struggle when the team is available but not qualified for the work.

What choices or trade-offs do we need to make?

Sue discusses options like reducing scope, shifting timing, adding contractors, or rethinking whether the work should happen now.

• She distinguishes between quantitative benefits and strategic, qualitative benefits, noting that both can matter depending on the goal.

What could prevent us from achieving the outcome?

Sue encourages leaders to think through risks, competing priorities, shared resources, organizational changes, and contingency planning.

• She recommends building in contingency funding and extra time when uncertainty is high.
• The episode closes by encouraging listeners to use these questions in one-on-ones, client conversations, and team meetings to avoid rushed decisions and future rework.

Connect with Susan M. Barber

If this episode resonated with you, share it with another leader who would benefit!

You can connect with Susan M. Barber for coaching, leadership development, speaking engagements, and visibility strategy work focused on helping leaders become more influential, trusted, and impactful inside organizations. Check out my books, The Visibility Factor and Your Journey to Visibility Workbook!

https://susanmbarber.com

https://www.linkedin.com/in/susanbarbercoaching/