What happens when you spend years proving yourself, only to find that the people around you are making you question your worth?

Heather Monahan knows that experience firsthand. After rising to the C-suite as a chief revenue officer, she was fired from the company where she had built a successful career. Instead of hiding what happened, she shared it publicly, asked for help, and began building something new.

In this conversation, Heather explains why confidence isn’t something you’re born with. It’s something you build through the decisions you make, the risks you take, and the way you respond when life doesn’t go according to plan.

Together, we explore how to recognize toxic environments, stand up for yourself without losing your integrity, and stop letting other people’s judgments become your identity.

In this episode, you’ll discover:

• Why self-doubt can persist even when you’re successful.
• How your environment can either strengthen your confidence or slowly erode it.
• Why Heather believes you should never take a no from someone who can’t give you a yes.
• What toxic workplace dynamics can cost you, and when it’s time to walk away.
• How Heather turned being fired into a career-changing opportunity.
• Why confidence is built through small actions, not one defining moment.
• How to use fear as a signal to move forward instead of retreat.
• How journaling can help you identify the beliefs and relationships holding you back.
• Why setting boundaries is essential to protecting your growth.

You don’t have to wait until you feel confident to make a change. You build confidence by taking the next step, especially when it scares you. And sometimes, the environment you’re afraid to leave is the very thing keeping you from becoming who you could be.

Grab the full show notes here.

Download the Companion Workbook.

Pre-Order The Mattering Effect: https://matteringeffect.com/. Take the 90-second diagnostic to see if you're disappearing.

Explore the Show: https://passionstruck.com/starter-packs/. New to Passion Struck? Start with the best episodes curated for you.

Connect with John

• Website: https://johnrmiles.com
• Book John to Speak: https://johnrmiles.com/speaking/
• Substack: https://www.theignitedlife.net/
• Children’s Book — You Matter, Luma: https://youmatterluma.com/

Support the Movement: https://startmattering.com/. Every human deserves to feel seen, valued, and like they matter. Wear it. Live it. Show it.

Passion Struck — #1 Alternative Health Podcast. 85M+ downloads.

Disclaimer

The Passion Struck podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. The views and opinions expressed do not necessarily reflect those of Passion Struck or its affiliates. This podcast is not a substitute for professional medical or psychological advice.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

Why do some teams bring out the best in people while others turn colleagues into competitors? The answer may lie in the way we structure power, status, and success.

On this episode of Passion Struck, I sit down with Dr. Nir Halevy, a Stanford professor who studies social influence, power, and human behavior, to explore his book, Level Up: Why Hierarchies Are Broken and How to Fix Them.

Drawing on decades of research and real-world examples from elite sports, healthcare, academia, and corporate America, Nir explains why hierarchy itself isn't necessarily the problem. The real issue is whether the systems we create encourage people to work together or push them to succeed at one another's expense.

We discuss:

• Why hierarchies persist: Why eliminating hierarchy is rarely practical, and how to distinguish structures that help teams function from those that create harm.
• The danger of forced rankings: How pitting employees against one another can encourage information hoarding, rivalry, and even sabotage.
• The psychology of social comparison: Why another person's success can change how we experience our own, even when nothing about our performance has changed.
• Dominance versus prestige: The difference between leading through intimidation and leading through competence, contribution, and respect.
• The three warning signs of a broken hierarchy: Excessive competition, injustice, and instability—and how they undermine trust and retention.
• Why fairness matters: How unfair outcomes, opaque procedures, and disrespectful treatment combine to make people feel powerless.
• What leaders can learn from improv: How active listening, psychological safety, empathy, and making your teammates look good can strengthen relationships.
• How to build healthier teams: Why leaders should create multiple ways for people to contribute and demonstrate their value, rather than tying worth to a single ranking.

Nir leaves us with one question every leader should consider: Does your hierarchy bring people closer together or pull them apart? Because the goal isn't to eliminate structure. It's to build systems in which people can succeed without making others feel like they have to lose.

See the Full Shownotes.

Pre-Order The Mattering Effect: https://matteringeffect.com/. Take the 90-second diagnostic to see if you're disappearing.

Explore the Show: https://passionstruck.com/starter-packs/. New to Passion Struck? Start with the best episodes curated for you.

Connect with John

• Website: https://johnrmiles.com
• Book John to Speak: https://johnrmiles.com/speaking/
• Substack: https://www.theignitedlife.net/
• Children’s Book — You Matter, Luma: https://youmatterluma.com/

Support the Movement: https://startmattering.com/. Every human deserves to feel seen, valued, and like they matter. Wear it. Live it. Show it.

Passion Struck — #1 Alternative Health Podcast. 85M+ downloads.

Disclaimer

The Passion Struck podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. The views and opinions expressed do not necessarily reflect those of Passion Struck or its affiliates. This podcast is not a substitute for professional medical or psychological advice.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

What if the voice you use to motivate yourself is the very voice keeping you stuck?

You push harder after a mistake. You judge yourself for falling short. You tell yourself that if you were more disciplined, more successful, or simply better, you would finally feel worthy. But what if being hard on yourself isn't making you stronger? What if it’s making it harder to recover, grow, and move forward?

According to today’s guest, self-compassion isn’t self-pity or letting yourself off the hook. It’s learning how to respond to difficulty without turning against yourself.

Dr. Kristin Neff is a pioneering researcher in self-compassion and the creator of the Self-Compassion Institute. In this conversation, she explains why so many of us tie our worth to achievement, how our inner critic can intensify shame and disconnection, and how self-compassion can help us respond to life's challenges with greater clarity and care.

In this conversation, you’ll learn:

• Why being hard on yourself doesn't necessarily make you more motivated or successful.
• The difference between self-esteem, which evaluates your worth, and self-compassion, which responds to your humanity.
• How achievement, appearance, status, and external approval become measures of worth.
• Why shame, loneliness, burnout, and emotional numbness can be connected to a deeper sense of disconnection.
• How self-compassion creates space between what you feel and how you choose to respond.
• Why compassion can help you recognize your needs, set boundaries, and act with greater intention.
• How parents can model self-compassion for children without turning it into another expectation.
• A simple practice for responding to difficult moments with warmth instead of self-judgment.

Kristin shares a powerful phrase to return to when you’re struggling: “I will not abandon you. I am here for you. I care.”

You don’t have to earn the right to treat yourself with compassion. You can begin in the very moment you feel you’ve fallen short.

Check the full shownotes here.

Get the Companion Digital Workbook.

Pre-Order The Mattering Effect: https://matteringeffect.com/. Take the 90-second diagnostic to see if you're disappearing.

Explore the Show: https://passionstruck.com/starter-packs/. New to Passion Struck? Start with the best episodes curated for you.

Connect with John

• Website: https://johnrmiles.com
• Book John to Speak: https://johnrmiles.com/speaking/
• Substack: https://www.theignitedlife.net/
• Children’s Book — You Matter, Luma: https://youmatterluma.com/

Support the Movement: https://startmattering.com/. Every human deserves to feel seen, valued, and like they matter. Wear it. Live it. Show it.

Passion Struck — #1 Alternative Health Podcast. 85M+ downloads.

Disclaimer

The Passion Struck podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. The views and opinions expressed do not necessarily reflect those of Passion Struck or its affiliates. This podcast is not a substitute for professional medical or psychological advice.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

What if the beliefs you hold about yourself, your future, and the world around you are shaping what happens next more than you realize?

Shawn Achor, bestselling author and one of the leading voices in positive psychology, joins John R. Miles to explore the science behind The Power of Beliefs. Drawing on research in psychology, medicine, education, and human performance, Shawn explains how the way we interpret our circumstances can shape how we respond to them, what we attempt, and what becomes possible.

But this isn't a conversation about pretending everything will work out. Shawn explains the difference between a belief that creates real possibilities and wishful thinking, including a practical method for grounding beliefs in evidence and connecting them to the actions that make change more likely.

The conversation takes a deeply personal turn when Shawn shares how the premature birth of his daughter led him to step away from work, only to later feel that he was being replaced. A chance encounter with a stranger reminded him that his work had made a difference. That moment opens the door to a bigger question: What happens when we stop believing that we matter?

Together, John and Shawn explore how the beliefs that shape our lives are connected to belonging, meaningful work, social connection, and the environments we create for one another.

In this episode, you'll discover:

• Why pursuing success first and expecting happiness to follow can leave you perpetually dissatisfied.
• How beliefs can influence outcomes, from the placebo effect to the home-field advantage in sports.
• The difference between grounded optimism and wishful thinking.
• How to strengthen a belief by connecting it to evidence and specific actions.
• The seven core beliefs Shawn explores, including whether your behavior matters, whether you matter, whether you're alone, and whether your work is meaningful.
• Why Shawn's experience as a father changed his understanding of success, identity, and mattering.
• Why feeling that your work matters can be as important as compensation.
• How small acts of recognition, connection, and kindness can create feedback loops that change behavior.
• What leaders, parents, teachers, and individuals can do to help others see evidence that they matter.

The takeaway is simple but powerful: you don't have to pretend the odds are easy or the world is perfect to believe your actions can make a difference. You can build beliefs that acknowledge reality while helping you move toward a better future.

Pre-Order The Mattering Effect: https://matteringeffect.com/. Take the 90-second diagnostic to see if you're disappearing.

Explore the Show: https://passionstruck.com/starter-packs/. New to Passion Struck? Start with the best episodes curated for you.

Connect with John

• Website: https://johnrmiles.com
• Book John to Speak: https://johnrmiles.com/speaking/
• Substack: https://www.theignitedlife.net/
• Children’s Book — You Matter, Luma: https://youmatterluma.com/

Support the Movement: https://startmattering.com/. Every human deserves to feel seen, valued, and like they matter. Wear it. Live it. Show it.

Passion Struck — #1 Alternative Health Podcast. 85M+ downloads.

Disclaimer

The Passion Struck podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. The views and opinions expressed do not necessarily reflect those of Passion Struck or its affiliates. This podcast is not a substitute for professional medical or psychological advice.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

What if you can be successful, needed, productive, and admired, and still feel like you don't matter?

That's the paradox at the heart of John R. Miles' new book, The Mattering Effect.

In this special conversation, originally recorded for Mick Hunt's Mick Unplugged, Mick sits down with John to explore the personal story behind the book and the question that changed the direction of John's life:

Do I matter?

John shares the calling that emerged during a discipleship class, the experience that forced him to confront his own “slow fade,” and why he eventually recognized that burnout, loneliness, disengagement, and disconnection weren't separate problems—but symptoms of something deeper. AudioTranscriberAI_0aa8383c46d9…

The conversation then moves into the ideas behind The Mattering Effect: why being needed isn't the same as mattering, how the Great Erasure strips individuality from modern systems, and how the Mattering Needs Pyramid, M.A.T.T.E.R. Framework, and Mattering Compass can help rebuild a sense of worth, agency, connection, and impact.

Most importantly, this isn't just a conversation about a book. It's about what happens when you stop living to prove your worth and start living from the belief that you already have it.

Pre-Order The Mattering Effect: https://matteringeffect.com/. Take the 90-second diagnostic to see if you're disappearing.

Explore the Show: https://passionstruck.com/starter-packs/. New to Passion Struck? Start with the best episodes curated for you.

Connect with John

• Website: https://johnrmiles.com
• Book John to Speak: https://johnrmiles.com/speaking/
• Substack: https://www.theignitedlife.net/
• Children’s Book — You Matter, Luma: https://youmatterluma.com/

Support the Movement: https://startmattering.com/. Every human deserves to feel seen, valued, and like they matter. Wear it. Live it. Show it.

Passion Struck — #1 Alternative Health Podcast. 85M+ downloads.

Disclaimer

The Passion Struck podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes only. The views and opinions expressed do not necessarily reflect those of Passion Struck or its affiliates. This podcast is not a substitute for professional medical or psychological advice.

Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.