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If You're Driving, Close Your Eyes

If You're Driving, Close Your Eyes

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Welcome to If You're Driving, Close Your Eyes, a podcast about navigating the cruelty chaos, and wonder of our terrifying world. Niki, John, LB— and our producer Jordo— try to find meaning and clarity one or twelve subjects at a time: from the menu at Cheesecake Factory to a human man dressed up as Snoopy tucking you into bed.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

If You're Driving, Close Your Eyes 2022
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    Épisodes
    • On This Week’s 'The Pitt'
      Feb 23 2026

      Thanks to his extensive Hollywood connections, John lands the gang a gig writing, directing and starring in a new episode of The Pitt. Let the brainstorming begin!


      Welcome to If You're Driving, Close Your Eyes, a listener-supported comedy podcast where three noble explorers chip away at the crumbling foundations of reality, five or six simultaneous topics at a time. Hosted by Niki Grayson, merritt k and John Warren, and produced by Jordan Mallory, with music by Jordan and art by Max Schwartz.


      Follow us on Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/ifyouredriving.bsky.social


      Support us on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/ifyouredriving

      Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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      1 h
    • The Duggler
      Feb 16 2026

      I'm not sure how I feel about it, and honestly it's a little frightening, but somehow John, merritt and Niki spent an entire episode discussing a single topic. I can't remember the last time this happened, and truth be told I'm entirely positive that it's ever happened, but there's a first time for everything I guess. There is one brief but noteworthy diversion about Home Depot, but otherwise I hope you brought your knee pads.


      Welcome to If You're Driving, Close Your Eyes, a listener-supported comedy podcast where three noble explorers chip away at the crumbling foundations of reality, five or six simultaneous topics at a time. Hosted by Niki Grayson, merritt k and John Warren, and produced by Jordan Mallory, with music by Jordan and art by Max Schwartz.


      Follow us on Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/ifyouredriving.bsky.social


      Support us on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/ifyouredriving

      Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

      Afficher plus Afficher moins
      56 min
    • The Janitor at Munger Hall
      Feb 9 2026

      John, merritt and Niki have finally reunited, and the gang wastes no time getting down to business. What sorts of hammers are there? Do you know what a Munger Hall is? When was the last time that you, a six year old, went out for a fine meal? Do you get to watch it when they ... you know?? Plus a mega-sized installment of Scam Text Theater and, despite our best efforts, somehow even more.


      Welcome to If You're Driving, Close Your Eyes, a listener-supported comedy podcast where three noble explorers chip away at the crumbling foundations of reality, five or six simultaneous topics at a time. Hosted by Niki Grayson, merritt k and John Warren, and produced by Jordan Mallory, with music by Jordan and art by Max Schwartz.


      Follow us on Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/ifyouredriving.bsky.social


      Support us on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/ifyouredriving

      Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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      58 min
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