Humankind is a product of nature, and thus we are beholden to nature. Despite living in a world of caller-ID and screening-calls, when Nature calls we must answer. And that answer happens the same, every time. We use the toilet; a toilet that is has a pretty universally recognized shape and function. Everybody uses this apparatus multiple times a day, and so we must all be exceptionally well-versed in the operation of these simple artifices. But then why are they always labeled with warnings and remonstrations? Who keeps breaking the toilets? Hop a squat with Mat and Veronique as we struggle to decide what to flush down the toilet in loo of That Bathroom Sign!

*Grumbles are specifically off-the-cuff, no research went into this grumble.

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Support the show and become a Grumble Kid! Patreon.com/GrumbleGoat
Join the adventure in Mat’s novel!!! Amazon | Audible

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Mat’s Play, ‘Gruff: an Origin Story’ Feb. 11th!
Court Square Theatre in Long Island City: Theatre East

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For more information or to share: GrumbleGoatPodcast.com
Grumble Goat on Instagram | Facebook | TikTok
Follow your hosts: Mat | Veronique

The post That Bathroom Sign appeared first on Mat Labotka.

We mark a new year on the calendar. Like a barbarian whipping a flail around its chain, so too does the Earth whip around the sun to clobber us with the passage of time. And time, like the orbital momentums we attribute it to, can be cyclical. While its nice to take the New Year as an exercise in imagining a future unwritten, sometimes our propulsion is backward. It is one thing to reminisce about the olden days, and quite another to reforge erstwhile Reichs. How can we steer toward hope, when our captain’s compass only points to hate? Mutiny? Find your direction with Mat and Veronique as we drown out the Year of our King, 2025!

*Grumbles are specifically off-the-cuff, no research went into this grumble.

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Support the show and become a Grumble Kid! Patreon.com/GrumbleGoat
Join the adventure in Mat’s novel!!! Amazon | Audible

_____________________________________

Mat’s Play, ‘Gruff: an Origin Story’ Feb. 11th!
Court Square Theatre in Long Island City: Theatre East

_____________________________________

For more information or to share: GrumbleGoatPodcast.com
Grumble Goat on Instagram | Facebook | TikTok
Follow your hosts: Mat | Veronique

The post 2025 appeared first on Mat Labotka.

There is something deeply elemental about doors. Something lurks in our minds, possibly from our days living in caves, that profoundly impacts the way humankind’s subconscious reacts to doorways. ‘Opening Doors’ is metaphorically equivalent to obtaining opportunities. What prizes await behind Door Number Two? ‘Making an Entrance’ is to become the center of attention. As a matter of fact, the word ‘Entrance’ means both ‘Doorway’ and ‘Fill with wonder.’ So let’s take a moment to admire this doorway before we move through it. Except, there are people behind us. And there are folks coming the other way that need to use the door. Have you ever entered a room and forgotten why you entered in the first place? Cross the threshold with Mat, Veronique, and Guest – Chauncy Thomas – as we forget to even step into the room and instead, blissfully entertain in the space between two places, like a clog in the toilet, we stand Blocking Passageways!

*Grumbles are specifically off-the-cuff, no research went into this grumble.

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Support the show and become a Grumble Kid! Patreon.com/GrumbleGoat
Join the adventure in Mat’s novel!!! Amazon | Audible

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Follow Chauncy on Insta: @chauncythomas
Or see Chauncy in Christmas Carol if you’re in the area: Lyceum Theatre

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For more information or to share: GrumbleGoatPodcast.com
Grumble Goat on Instagram | Facebook | TikTok
Follow your hosts: Mat | Veronique

The post Blocking Passageways appeared first on Mat Labotka.

In this futuristic age, it is easy to forget that we are mortal. Humanity has become nearly all-powerful… we can summon the visage of someone in another realm on our magic mirrors regardless the distance; we can portend the future through the crystal ball of our Accuweather Apps; and we can séance the guidance of the non-living through Grok. But we are still beholden to the curses of our flesh and blood. There are still miasmas that render us prone, blights that cripple our ability to rise above the muck of the natural world. And we are vulnerable during this cold, and stressful season. And what woe that it is our very stress that delivers to us the very worst of our diseases. Bubble, bubble, toil, and trouble with Veronique and Mat as we curse the plaguing blight of The Pox!!!

*Grumbles are specifically off-the-cuff, no research went into this grumble.

_____________________________________

Support the show and become a Grumble Kid! Patreon.com/GrumbleGoat
Join the adventure in Mat’s novel!!! Amazon | Audible

_____________________________________

For more information or to share: GrumbleGoatPodcast.com
Grumble Goat on Instagram | Facebook | TikTok
Follow your hosts: Mat | Veronique

The post The Pox appeared first on Mat Labotka.

As Autumn sets in once again, humanity must face the eternal questions of decay that haunt the bare branches and long shadows of Hallow’s Eve. Life is full of Grumbles, as this podcast attests; but so then is the ever-present awareness of mortality. As the spiritual veil pulls back, now is the time to question that infinite darkness of the beyond. But which is the more haunting idea: to cross the River Styx and join the dead, or to remain tethered to this world with business unfinished? Percolate this purgatory with Mat and Veronique as we invoke the spirits and confront our metaphysical and metaphorical Ghosts!

*Grumbles are specifically off-the-cuff, no research went into this grumble.

_____________________________________

Support the show and become a Grumble Kid! Patreon.com/GrumbleGoat
Join the adventure in Mat’s novel!!! Amazon | Audible

_____________________________________

For more information or to share: GrumbleGoatPodcast.com
Grumble Goat on Instagram | Facebook | TikTok
Follow your hosts: Mat | Veronique

The post Ghosts appeared first on Mat Labotka.

The meaning of life is a question that has plagued philosophers since the dawn of time. Some say love, or laughter, maybe presence of mind, even the number 42 may hold the answer; but the question persists. Except in a scientific sense. The whole purpose of life in a scientific sense is to procreate. The proliferation of life is the purpose of life. This, very simply, means that we must pair off. As in Noah’s Ark, two-by-two we must seclude ourselves and procreate. Some species don’t like to cohabitate, like the Black Widow or the Praying Mantis, it’s more of a one-night-stand situation. And some animals choose to mate for life, like the penguin or the swan. And then there is Humankind. Of course we complicate things with bureaucracy. Contracts must be signed and alliances must be strengthened through generational guarantees. And when taxes are owed, the government needs certification that these two individuals have obligated themselves to mate for life. Bind yourself to Mat and Veronique as we remove the Romantic Comedy from our lives and chase that stoic, concrete nuptial contract of Weddings!

*Grumbles are specifically off-the-cuff, no research went into this grumble.

_____________________________________

Support the show and become a Grumble Kid! Patreon.com/GrumbleGoat
Join the adventure in Mat’s novel!!! Amazon | Audible

_____________________________________

For more information or to share: GrumbleGoatPodcast.com
Grumble Goat on Instagram | Facebook | TikTok
Follow your hosts: Mat | Veronique

The post Weddings appeared first on Mat Labotka.

Music is a fundamental element to humankind’s soul. Before spoken language, there was music. Our bodies have circadian rhythms and heart beats, but also our nature calls us to tap and clap. Drums call us to dance and horns summon us to war. We sing to our babies and we sing to our gods. We fife our revolutions and we Dance Dance Revolution. The melody is inside of us and it harmonizes with our nature. But like a crippling addiction, we demand more and more. Turn it up! More cowbell! Modern speaker technology allows music to cripple us. The bass is no longer moving our feet so much as quaking our footing. When fans are passing out earplugs at the concerts they paid to attend, are we harmonizing with our inner-selves or masochistically self-destructing? Amplify your rage with Mat and Veronique as we push past the tinnitus with the deafening cacophony of Music Volume!

*Grumbles are specifically off-the-cuff, no research went into this grumble.

_____________________________________

Support the show and become a Grumble Kid! Patreon.com/GrumbleGoat
Join the adventure in Mat’s novel!!! Amazon | Audible

_____________________________________

For more information or to share: GrumbleGoatPodcast.com
Grumble Goat on Instagram | Facebook | TikTok
Follow your hosts: Mat | Veronique

The post Music Volume appeared first on Mat Labotka.

In humankinds modern, late-stage-capitalistic world, one of the most celebrated luxuries is Flavor. Chefs and Sommeliers are world renowned celebrities. The spicy Scoville-covered-chicken enhanced interrogations called ‘Hot Ones’ is not only legal under the Geneva Conventions, but popular entertainment. For thousands of years, salt, spices, teas, and flavors have caused wars, slave-trade, and the fall of dynasties. But, now, in the days of the Coca-Cola Freestyle machine, where 165 flavors are the touch-of-a-button away, people still grapple over flavor. When Sumatran Arabica and Ecuadorian Robusta are on the same shelf as Celsius, how can either be the finer? Wake up with Veronique and Mat to the vibrant, robust odor or Coffee Snobs!

*Grumbles are specifically off-the-cuff, no research went into this grumble.

_____________________________________

Support the show and become a Grumble Kid! Patreon.com/GrumbleGoat
Join the adventure in Mat’s novel!!! Amazon | Audible

_____________________________________

For more information or to share: GrumbleGoatPodcast.com
Grumble Goat on Instagram | Facebook | TikTok
Follow your hosts: Mat | Veronique

The post Coffee Snobs appeared first on Mat Labotka.