Women are socialised throughout their lives to be a mother. Meanwhile most dads won’t hold a baby until it’s their own. 90% of dads want to be more involved in their children's lives but we’re still prioritising a mother’s relationship with their children over a dad’s. Insufficient paternity leave is having serious consequences for families, men’s mental health and our ability to feel like equal partnerships.

In today’s conversation, Rachel and Kate speak with George Gabriel, CEO and co-founder of The Dadshift, about the importance of paternity leave and the changing landscape of fatherhood. We explore the challenges faced by new fathers, the need for supportive policies, and the cultural narratives surrounding masculinity and fatherhood.

The Dad Shift is just one of a number of organisations campaigning for better parental leave rights. Find out more, and support the work that all these incredible campaigns are doing. If we’ve missed any, do tell us!

• The Dad Shift

• Pregnant then Screwed

• The Fatherhood Institute

• Working Families

Subscribe to Equal-ish on Apple Podcasts or Spotify to be the first to hear the coaching edit from our interview.
Find out more about your hosts Kate Mangino and Rachel Childs.

Kate & Rachel wallow in all the nuances around gate keeping… including personal reflection that we do it too! Many women have been socialized to believe that to be valuable, they must maintain power and knowledge of the home. But this isn’t a great receipt for equal-ish households. Instead, Kate & Rachel suggest….

1. There’s no pretty way to say this: gatekeepers need to do some self-reflection.

2. Look at your family’s roots. Where did you learn your patterns? Do you need a reboot?

3. We need to regularly and intentionally interrupt social patterns. Decide together what words will we use when we notice gatekeeping going on?

4. Remembering that your family is a system, which includes family, friends, providers, and neighbors. And they all might have a role in gatekeeping or gateopening.

Subscribe to Equal-ish on Apple Podcasts or Spotify to be the first to hear the coaching edit from our interview. And for just one more week, you can also be part of building Equal-ish! We have some great rewards for all levels of engagement, and multiple ways for you to get involved. Please help us grow Equal-ish and get this out to the thousands of parents that could benefit. Your support means the world to us, thank you: https://www.ifundwomen.com/projects/equal-ish-podcast
Find out more about your hosts Kate Mangino and Rachel Childs.

If the outcome you are seeking is equal partnership, why do mothers subconsciously put barriers up to it? Today Kate and Rachel talk “all things maternal gatekeeping” with Dr. Sarah Schoppe-Sullivan, who is a Professor of Psychology at The Ohio State University in Columbus, Ohio. She is a nationally and internationally recognized expert on coparenting, father-child relationships, and the transition to parenthood.

Interested in learning more about Dr. Schoppe-Sullivan’s work? Find out more here.

Subscribe to Equal-ish on Apple Podcasts or Spotify to be the first to hear the coaching edit from our interview. And for one more week, you can also be part of building Equal-ish! Our crowdfunding campaign is live now! You've got 8 days left to grab yourself a pair of Equal-ish socks! Please help us grow Equal-ish and get this out to the thousands of parents that could benefit. Support today: https://www.ifundwomen.com/projects/equal-ish-podcast

Find out more about your hosts Kate Mangino and Rachel Childs.

In this episodes we tell you that that next we have Dr Sheehan Fisher talking about paternal mental health. That was the plan, but he's coming later in November now, first up we have George Gabriel from the Dad Shift.

• Kate and Rachel dive into the Dr Allison Daminger interview to discuss how you can really share the cognitive labor. Listen now to hear our tips on how to

  1. Define balance for yourself
  2. Why parental leave and new norms matter
  3. How to change your family script
  4. Connect on the thinking and doing tasks
  5. Challenge the barriers we all face

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  Want more language on the difference between cognitive labor, emotional labor, and the mental load? Check out this article by Kate.

  Subscribe to Equal-ish on Apple Podcasts or Spotify to be the first to hear the coaching edit from our interview.

  And for a short while, you can also be part of building Equal-ish! We have a crowdfunding campaign live for the next 2 weeks. We have some great rewards for all levels of engagement, and multiple ways for you to get involved. Please help us grow Equal-ish and get this out to the thousands of parents that could benefit. Your support means the world to us, thank you: https://www.ifundwomen.com/projects/equal-ish-podcast
  Find out more about your hosts Kate Mangino and Rachel Childs.

The household divide is greater than we think it is. It’s so much more than the physical tasks - it’s all the thinking and feeling work that goes along with the physical work. And that is why we feel it so deeply; we have an emotional reaction to household labor because household tasks are far more than cooking and cleaning.

Kate and Rachel are joined this week by Dr. Allison Daminger, an assistant professor of sociology at UW-Madison and the author of the new book What's on Her Mind: The Mental Workload of Family Life. Her research focuses on how and why gender shapes family dynamics, particularly the division of work and power in couples.

In this conversation, Kate & Rachel ask Allison all about cognitive labor (a term, by the way, that SHE defined) particularly in the context of parenting and household responsibilities. This interview was perfectly timed, as Allison herself is a new mom and, with her partner, is working to put theory into practice.

Get your copy of What’s On Her Mind: https://www.allisondaminger.com/book

Subscribe to Equal-ish on Apple Podcasts or Spotify to be the first to hear the coaching edit from our interview. And for a short while, you can also be part of building Equal-ish! Our crowdfunding campaign is live now! We have some great rewards for all levels of engagement, and multiple ways for you to get involved. Please help us grow Equal-ish and get this out to the thousands of parents that could benefit. Support today: https://www.ifundwomen.com/projects/equal-ish-podcast
Find out more about your hosts Kate Mangino and Rachel Childs.

In this coaching edit, Kate and Rachel break down key themes from their interview with Marvyn.

Marvyn Harrison is the founder of Dope Black Dads, a globally recognised platform exploring fatherhood, masculinity and mental health and is shaping conversation around Black fatherhood and redefining modern masculinity.

1. The work starts with you… and continues with others

2. We need to acknowledge that society makes parenting hard for men

3. Focus on who you are NOW - not the PAST You

4. What are the economics of Equal Partnership

5. Is it boundaries or balance that you need?

6. To be a great parent, you need to be a PALS first. Listen to find out exactly what that means

Dad groups are new-ish! If you’re looking for one to join (or be inspired about starting your own) check out these existing groups:

• Dope Black Dads

• All Parents Welcome

• Andy’s Man Club

• Dad Matters

• The Company of Dads

• Brooklyn Stoller Club

• Dad Guild

Find out more about your hosts Kate Mangino and Rachel Childs.

Rachel and Kate are joined by Marvyn Harrison. Marvyn is the founder of Dope Black Dads, a globally recognised platform exploring fatherhood, masculinity and mental health and is shaping conversation around Black fatherhood and redefining modern masculinity. In today’s interview, Marvyn helps us all see the way that society closes gates for fathers… and what we can all do to change that.

Discover Marvyn's community: https://dopeblack.org/

Subscribe to Equal-ish on Apple Podcasts or Spotify to be the first to hear the coaching edit from our interview, launching next week.

Find out more about your hosts Kate Mangino and Rachel Childs.

Last week, we interviewed Zach Watson. Zach is an invisible labour coach who helps men understand and share the mental load of domestic responsibilities with their partners. And his interview gave us great fodder for this week’s coaching edit.

1. Give yourself permission to fail.

2. What words would you actually use with your spouse / partner?

3. What to include in the weekly check-in.

4. Why are men motivated to be equal-ish at home?

5. How to find your people, and find support.

Subscribe to Equal-ish on Apple Podcasts or Spotify to be the first to hear the coaching edit from our interview.

Find out more about your hosts Kate Mangino and Rachel Childs.