Happy Halloween!

Remember when Halloween meant toilet-papering houses, throwing eggs, and running for your life from a pissed-off neighbor in a bathrobe and saggy tighty-whities? Those were the good old days!

This week on Professionally Offended, Jayson takes a hilarious trip down memory lane, wonders if Michael Myers was just misunderstood, and investigates how Spirit Halloween stores magically appear overnight like a seasonal STD.

Then it's time for a night out that involves questionable karaoke, emotional performances of "Strawberry Wine," and the horrifying realization that getting older might be scarier than any slasher movie.

Throw in another absolutely ridiculous Reddit story, a few things that pissed Jayson off, and a Before I Go that might just hit you where you least expect it.

Halloween used to be about tricks, treats, and a little harmless vandalism. Now it's about doorbell cameras, angry parents, and kids who couldn't TP a house without watching a YouTube tutorial.

Everyone has an opinion. Mine comes with a microphone.

Professionally Offended — Available wherever you listen to podcasts.

PROFESSIONALLY OFFENDED
Everyone has an opinion. Mine comes with a microphone.

Follow Professionally Offended:
Instagram: @ProOffended
TikTok: @ProOffended
YouTube: @ProOffended

Email: jayson@professionallyoffended.com

New episodes weekly. Subscribe, follow, and prepare to be offended.