Think you speak English? Think again.

If you've ever been told "I'm fine" when someone clearly wasn't, wondered why "You alright?" isn't actually a question, or been completely baffled by phrases like "taking the piss," "Bob's your uncle," or "pack it in," this book is your hilarious guide to decoding British English.

Stop Taking the Piss explores over 100 of Britain's most confusing words, sayings, expressions, mannerisms, and social habits, revealing what people really mean—not just what they say.

Inside you'll discover:

• Everyday phrases that mean the exact opposite of their literal words

• British slang you'll never learn in a classroom

• Polite insults and backhanded compliments that sound surprisingly friendly

• The unwritten rules of pubs, queues, apologies, tea, and small talk

• Regional accents and dialects explained without the confusion

• Hilarious real-life examples that make every expression unforgettable

• The famous Piss-o-Meter™ rating every phrase for peak Britishness

Whether you're visiting Britain, moving to the UK, learning English, or simply love British humour, this entertaining guide will have you laughing while finally understanding what everyone is really saying.

After listening to this book, you'll never hear "Not bad," "Cheers," or "With all due respect" the same way again.

Warning: Side effects may include talking about the weather, apologising to furniture, and judging queue-jumpers with nothing more than a raised eyebrow.