Say It Like You Mean It
The Science of Apologies and How They Might Just Save Us
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Say It Like You Mean It
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Narrated by:
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By:
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Judy Eaton
We're taught from an early age that a good apology is an essential element of repair, a way of making and keeping friends, and helpful in moving on from conflicts, both small and large. But without regular use, that muscle grows weak, and our lives today are awash with half-hearted and insincere apologies. Whether it's a celebrity posting an apology online for past racist remarks, a CEO issuing a televised apology for corporate malfeasance, or just a friend cancelling dinner at the last minute, most of us have abandoned the earnest shows of reconciliation we learned on the playground.
We all apologize--we have to if we want to get through life. But what makes a "good" apology? When is one necessary, and when is it overkill? Why do members of some cultures seem to apologize more than others? And why does the average apology so often ring hollow? With fascinating case studies and original research, Say It Like You Mean It shows us why apologies have been, and continue to be, the key to our survival as a species.
In an ever more polarized world, it is essential to understand the role of remorse and the way that genuine reconciliation can fuel a brighter, more human future. Say It Like You Mean It is the perfect guide to understanding this human instinct and how to deploy it to make a better world for us all.
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Reviews
ADVANCE PRAISE FOR SAY IT LIKE YOU MEAN IT
“A fascinating look at responsibility, remorse, and repair. This book will make you a better person—and a better apologizer—while taking you on an unexpectedly delightful tour of apologies throughout history. A deeply informative and helpful read.” —Chris Bailey, bestselling author of The Productivity Project, How to Calm Your Mind, Hyperfocus, and Intentional
“In this wise, humane, and highly readable book, Judy Eaton gives apologies the scientific attention they deserve and shows why they are the most powerful tool we have for repairing relationships. This book will change how you think about saying ‘sorry’ and about the people that say it to you.” —Chris Moore, author of The Power of Guilt
“An apology can be a miraculous thing, capable of righting wrongs, mending relationships, or getting you out of a jam. But it works best if you understand the art of apologizing-how to offer one authentically, how to accept one (or know if an apology is even needed). Say It Like You Mean It explains it all, with surprising insights and fascinating stories along the way. Read this book-you won't be sorry!” —Warren Berger, bestselling author of A More Beautiful Question
“Apologies are the duct tape of the social world, capable of repairing even the most fractured relationships. So why are so many of the apologies we hear so terrible? Drawing on fascinating stories and her own scientific research, Dr. Judy Eaton offers a witty and insightful anatomy of why apologies are so powerful—and why we so often get them wrong. It's a delightful and surprisingly useful book about one of life's most important skills.” —Colin M. Fisher, author of The Collective Edge
“I'm thrilled by Judy Eaton's wide-ranging look at apology. She zips from the Political Apology Database, to how to apologize for blotto behavior when drinking too much in ancient China, to how an apology can derail the inevitable in a Prisoner's Dilemma game. Then she brings it back home to what we can say if we've messed up-or what people can say to us, when they're the ones who messed up.” —Susan McCarthy, coauthor of Sorry, Sorry, Sorry: The Case for Good Apologies
“A fascinating look at responsibility, remorse, and repair. This book will make you a better person—and a better apologizer—while taking you on an unexpectedly delightful tour of apologies throughout history. A deeply informative and helpful read.” —Chris Bailey, bestselling author of The Productivity Project, How to Calm Your Mind, Hyperfocus, and Intentional
“In this wise, humane, and highly readable book, Judy Eaton gives apologies the scientific attention they deserve and shows why they are the most powerful tool we have for repairing relationships. This book will change how you think about saying ‘sorry’ and about the people that say it to you.” —Chris Moore, author of The Power of Guilt
“An apology can be a miraculous thing, capable of righting wrongs, mending relationships, or getting you out of a jam. But it works best if you understand the art of apologizing-how to offer one authentically, how to accept one (or know if an apology is even needed). Say It Like You Mean It explains it all, with surprising insights and fascinating stories along the way. Read this book-you won't be sorry!” —Warren Berger, bestselling author of A More Beautiful Question
“Apologies are the duct tape of the social world, capable of repairing even the most fractured relationships. So why are so many of the apologies we hear so terrible? Drawing on fascinating stories and her own scientific research, Dr. Judy Eaton offers a witty and insightful anatomy of why apologies are so powerful—and why we so often get them wrong. It's a delightful and surprisingly useful book about one of life's most important skills.” —Colin M. Fisher, author of The Collective Edge
“I'm thrilled by Judy Eaton's wide-ranging look at apology. She zips from the Political Apology Database, to how to apologize for blotto behavior when drinking too much in ancient China, to how an apology can derail the inevitable in a Prisoner's Dilemma game. Then she brings it back home to what we can say if we've messed up-or what people can say to us, when they're the ones who messed up.” —Susan McCarthy, coauthor of Sorry, Sorry, Sorry: The Case for Good Apologies
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