I guess trying to catch the bus with your laces undone isn’t such a smart decision after all…

One fatal collision later, and I’m facing my judgment. As it turns out, I’ve been a lazy sob, and my short, uneventful life of playing games and getting up late wasn’t worth much. And so I don’t qualify to move on to the afterlife.

I try to argue to the goddess in front of me that I do have skills, that it was hard work playing those simulation and management games. But she will not concede.

In the end, I manage to get the benefit of the doubt, and a wager is made. To test my claims, I’ll be sent to a desolate, Level 1 village with the mission to make it thrive. If I fail or die, the goddess will bring me back to my old life, back to the drudge of working at the grocery store.

But that’s not going to happen. I will prove that all these countless hours spent in front of my computer were not in—

Ack, my head! Where the hell have I landed? Looks like a dilapidated farm, with a few huts scattered about. Qualifies as a desolate village, alright. I can’t believe it. This is it! I’m actually doing this! But where do I even begin…Yes, first, find the Mayor…but then what, convince her to hand over the keys so I can work my magic? Could it be that simple?

Oh, there she is. Uh, hello? Hmm, why isn’t she waking up? Maybe I should go look for some quest to do in the meantime. Uh, are these goblins I see there on the road?

“You are under attack!”

Dang.