Cover of F--ked at 40

F--ked at 40

Life Beyond Suburbia, Monogamy and Stretch Marks

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F--ked at 40

By: Tova Leigh
Narrated by: Tova Leigh
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For every woman that has ever felt trapped; a funny, raw, and empowering mid-life-crisis.

Creator, mother, lover, and social media phenomenon Tova Leigh explores what the hell you are supposed to do when you find yourself living a life you don't remember signing up for.

I was bored, angry, tired, and sad. I felt all alone yet I had nothing to complain about. I had a good job, a husband who wasn't shagging his assistant, three children who apart from being the occasional a**holes were pretty good kids; a house, a dog, and everything else we are told as little girls we should aspire to. But inside, I was growing restless. I didn't want to be looked at as just a "mom". I wanted to be desired, to make someone's hair stand on end and go crazy for me. I didn't want to live by some label that didn't represent me. I looked at my messy minivan one morning and I wanted to vomit on it all. I panicked, thinking about how I am slowly approaching middle age and menopause, and I wondered how many years do I have left of being "f--ckable" before everything starts going downhill?

In her first book, Tova takes the listener on her journey of rediscovering who she is after motherhood and beyond the norms society forces upon women, whilst encouraging them to break free and just be themselves.

When you find authenticity it's hard to go back. It's like opening a door to the truth and starting to breathe a new type of air. This discovery is what prompted me to write. It's my way of saying HERE I AM.

©2020 Tova Leigh (P)2020 Watkins Publishing
Parenting & Families Personal Development Personal Success Relationships
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I was disappointed by the book and expected much more from the title and preface. I do not mean the intimate details of self-explorations (btw, there're none in the book) but I hoped to find deeper insights into frustrations and how they were overcome. I imagine that there were many crucial and difficult dialogues with the husband, where compromises were found and rules were marked and probably modified over time. They are crucial if this books aims at its core to help and guide other frustrated women around their 40. It looks just amazing how jealousy and fear of loss do not pop up in the story at all. It's a story of a tired and frustrated mom, mom, one more time mom and wife... And it comes back to being a mom and wife, just "funny-crazy" now. To me, it was even nearly shocking to find out that modern women STILL continue seeing themselves as moms in the first place and wives. Really? Very important book for those who still continue the paths and ideologies of women of the 1950's. But if you've been rather open-minded all your life you won't find it much useful for self growth.
In the end I even didn't understand if the title was fulfilled. Finally it seemed not to be that important but just the idea of it being possible is what mattered... The main conclusion is that at 40 women should rather seek 20-something boys to match their needs. Hmm... Everybody is different, I guess :) The idea of climbing the mountain was not very clear. What role did it play in the self growth and going open (and making it possible to be f...)? I will not go for a second book, sorry. It just felt that a lot was left backstage as the author was not ready or comfortable sharing it. The sense of humour is much appreciated :)

The story doesn't hold to its ambition

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