But Seriously, Do Less
A Guide to Underparenting Your Kids into a Resilient Future
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But Seriously, Do Less
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Summary
Parents today are really good at advocating for their children. The flip side of this well-meaning flex, however, is seriously problematic. Because as Dr. Amy Funkenstein explains, having to do hard things for yourself is one of the primary ways humans mature. When we deny our kids the opportunity to figure things out on their own, we have only ourselves to blame when they are twenty-something and still living in the basement!
Drawing on Dr. Funkenstein’s long experience working with families, her patient stories, and a handful of unforgettable anecdotes from her eccentric Jewish mother, But Seriously, Do Less will:
- give parents the foundational knowledge, scripts, and tips to confidently intervene less and watch the natural consequences teach a lesson better than we ever could on our own
- teach readers the unsung skill of being spectacularly unhelpful when asked to help solve problems
- guide us to model imperfection so that our kids don’t get the wrong idea about us as role models.
Grounded in trustworthy developmental science but with an irreverence that helps the medicine go down, But Seriously, Do Less gives parents the permission to stop helicoptering, hovering, and lawnmowing a failure-free path to adulthood and yet still raise more independent, resilient, confident children.
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Reviews
“Telling overprotective and over-involved parents that they should take their feet off the gas pedal hopefully will start a vast and healthy discussion all across the country. Amy Funkenstein’s funny, chatty tone makes the lessons go down easy. I’m excited and curious to see what’ll happen when I put this book into the hands of parents I know.”—Ira Glass, host of This American Life
“But seriously, buy this book. It’s shocking in the best way, trustworthy, practical and up-to-the minute. Stands out from the crowd. Halleluiah!”—Wendy Mogel, bestselling author of The Blessing of a Skinned Knee and The Blessing of a B-
“It’s high time for the pendulum to swing back from intensive parenting towards doing what’s best for kids in the long-term . . . not what feels nicest or easiest in the moment. Dr. Funkenstein’s philosophy is a breath of fresh air in our climate of overly stressed parents and under prepared young people.”—Michelle Icard, author of Fourteen Talks by Age Fourteen and 8 Setbacks that Can Make Your Child a Success
“But seriously, buy this book. It’s shocking in the best way, trustworthy, practical and up-to-the minute. Stands out from the crowd. Halleluiah!”—Wendy Mogel, bestselling author of The Blessing of a Skinned Knee and The Blessing of a B-
“It’s high time for the pendulum to swing back from intensive parenting towards doing what’s best for kids in the long-term . . . not what feels nicest or easiest in the moment. Dr. Funkenstein’s philosophy is a breath of fresh air in our climate of overly stressed parents and under prepared young people.”—Michelle Icard, author of Fourteen Talks by Age Fourteen and 8 Setbacks that Can Make Your Child a Success
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