Cover of 70 | More Defiant Behavior? Why Correcting Your Child Might Be Backfiring

70 | More Defiant Behavior? Why Correcting Your Child Might Be Backfiring

70 | More Defiant Behavior? Why Correcting Your Child Might Be Backfiring

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Summary
 Parenting Beyond Meltdowns is Ranked in the Top 2.5% of Podcasts Worldwide! Does it seem like the more you try to correct your child, the more they push back? Have you ever found yourself explaining something over and over, hoping they'll finally understand? Wonder why your efforts to help sometimes end in arguments, defensiveness, or your child shutting down? In This Episode In this episode of Parenting Beyond Meltdowns, I'm welcoming communication coach Terri Lee back for part two of our three-part conversation about building connection with our strong-willed and neurodivergent children. We're exploring why correcting, over-explaining, asking too many questions, and trying to fix everything can unintentionally create more resistance, even when our intentions come from love. Whether you're parenting a child with ADHD, ASD, ODD, or PDA, you may recognize how quickly defiant behavior, meltdowns, and dysregulation can leave you feeling dysregulated yourself. Terri shares how our children can experience our attempts to help as being managed rather than heard, especially as they grow into greater independence. We also talk about how fear influences our communication, why emotional regulation matters, and what becomes possible when we begin listening instead of immediately trying to fix things. Mama, you can learn to approach these moments with greater peace and connection as you continue trusting the Father with your child's journey. One Thing That Really Stood Out Something Terri shared in our conversation really struck me. Our good intentions don't always create the impact we're hoping for. As mamas, we want to prepare our children for life. We see potential consequences, recognize choices that concern us, and want to share the wisdom we've gained through our own experiences. But sometimes, underneath all that correcting and explaining, there's fear. Fear of what might happen if they make the wrong decision. Fear of the consequences they'll face. Fear that we're somehow failing them if we don't step in and make things right. And without realizing it, we can become so focused on fixing what's happening that we miss an opportunity to connect with the child standing in front of us. That's something I've had to recognize in my own parenting, too. Micro Shift of the Week The next time your child shares something that concerns you, notice what happens inside you. Do you feel an immediate urge to correct, explain, ask more questions, or solve the problem? Before responding, consider asking yourself: “Am I listening to understand my child, or am I trying to make my own fear go away?” You don't have to get it perfect. Just begin noticing the difference. Last Chance to Join My Six-Week Holiday Group Coaching Experience! Mama, if you're already anticipating the family gatherings, disrupted routines, extra time together, and opinions about your parenting this holiday season, I'd love to walk alongside you. Inside our six-week holiday group coaching experience, we'll work through the real situations you're facing so you can begin responding with more peace, confidence, and connection. Enrollment closes Friday, November 13! Learn More and Join Me for Holiday Coaching Links & Resources Anchored Mama Coaching: https://amandacalfee.com/coaching Join the Insiders List: https://amandacalfee.com/page/insider-list Ask Amanda: https://www.videoask.com/f20plh96w Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/amandacalfee/ Email: amanda@amandacalfee.com Facebook Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/anchoredmamas If you’re interested in the essential oils I personally use to support my family, you can find my Young Living Favorites Here. Disclaimer I am not a doctor, therapist, or medical professional. The information shared in this podcast, my coaching, and any Young Living recommendations are for educational and faith-based encouragement only. Nothing shared is intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any physical or mental health condition. Please consult a qualified healthcare provider or licensed therapist for concerns regarding your or your child's health, emotions, or well-being.
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